As we prepare to celebrate the virtues of living in the land
of the free and the home of the brave, and all the ingredients which make this
country great, it’s time to raise a glass.
Today we honor not only the courage and vision of those who won our independence, but we should also pause to give thanks and remember those things which bring us happiness and joy.
Here's to our federal government, which gave us a paid vacation day so we might get shitty drunk. Unless a terrible vocational choice has been made, we are spending the day in drunken splendor. Our founding fathers were wise enough to choose a beautiful summer day with us in mind. We barbeque, we bask in the air-conditioned comfort of our homes, huddle together in cool, dark bars, and we blow shit up. Most importantly, we drink. It's our right. We drink as an observation to this right. Hell, it's our duty.
So join me with a lifted glass and celebrate the freedom to drink. And let's also drink a little for those who are no longer around to join us in this toast.
Cheers to all of you. And cheers to America. Nice job.
